WHAT IF IT'S ALL ABOUT TRUST?

OR HAS SEXUALITY BECOME A COMMODITY?

What does our left brain, intellectual, rational, orderly mind do when we run into

something whose expression is completely right brained?

What happens when we attempt to get a handle on something that cannot be

captured with dialogue, reason, logic, measured argument, etc.?

Do we struggle to trust nonverbal communication? If our world of today is much more distrustful (fearful) than in other eras (like, say, the 1960s), could this be reflected in the continuing she said/he said sexual expression problems on our college campuses?

Could there be an effective solution to this national college life issue? A solution which comes to us from a much more open and trusting culture?

The applied sociology movement arose in the late 50s-early 60s in what is now called juvenile justice. Research Guided Group Interaction (GGI), Positive Peer Culture ( PPC) and Therapeutic Community ( TC). Or the most recently available research (https://eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ895350 and www.researchgate.net /publication/235640017_Positive_Youth_Psychology_Lessons_from_Positive_Peer_Culture.)

Our initiative —the Accusation Resolution Panel (ARP)—comes directly out of applied sociology. Please reference our website sexualityselfdefense.org for more details including our FSQ about the ARP.

When the overall trust level of a society begins to recede, as may be happening to us in the year 2018, do we need to rely more and more on our organized, predictable, structure-loving left brain hemisphere? And do we begin to struggle more and more with right brain concepts—vision, intuition, imagination, creativity—which are spontaneous, unpredictable, dreamy and which almost by definition cannot be harnessed, regulated, classified and separated or sub-divided into discrete homogeneous entities?

And so can sexuality—especially in college life—became the battleground wherein we—pushed by the increasing anxiety of an increasingly distrustful culture—are driven to attempt to impose left brain security on something whose true and authentic expression always must be right-brained? Communication without words? Is there any form of authentic (consensual, free) sexual expression that does not begin with a look, glance, continuing eye contact—all non-verbal bodily communication?

How does real trust develop? Perhaps through slowly increasing interactions between two people where each initiated action is reciprocated (or not) by the other?

Can our intuition tell us—as we embark on this communicational pathway—when a green light slowly (or even suddenly) begins turning yellow or even red?

Only if we can trust intuition—our social instincts. Can we sometimes not hear our intuition because it is being drowned out by expectations from the larger culture? Obligations? Politeness? Our self-image? Mood altering substances perhaps?

What happens when trust is missing?

In sexual expression, can one person have more invested than the other?

What if the other person notices?

Could this set up a power differential wherein the one with more power (less investment) can begin to exploit the desires of the other?

Do some of us use sexual attractiveness (born into the right genealogy) as power?

In a left brain-oriented world, how do we teach the healthy expression of sexuality which is —or should be—completely non-verbal?

“We need to teach our children (especially boys) the self-control, respect and communication necessary for healthy intimacy, and do it long before they have devices they can watch porn on”—Jacob (California) Modern Love, NYT, 5-20-18)

(“My boyfriend and I have worked out what consent looks like for us…our rule is that if the other person isn't enthusiastically reciprocating, everything stops”

Ibid

Here is what they ask: “Did you tell him no?”

Here is the truth, You can only say “no” so many times before whatever you say next is a lie”

Ibid

Has Sexuality Become A Commodity